My favorite excuse

I don't have time. There's no time to workout. There's no time to meal plan. People say you make time for the things that are important to you. Your kids your spouse some how you put yourself last. Yes working out is for me. That time I need. I need it for more than making myself into a healthier version of me. I need it because I spend time with God then. I get in my corner blare music in my ears and talk with God. Sometimes I don't hear the words of the music it's just sound. But, we all need that time. So my favorite excuse has turned into me time. Trying to make it intentional love for me. Hard to say sometimes that I love me because I have spent so much time beating myself up with all the negative. Today focusing on the positive this body still gets me going from one point to another and I love it.

Modified

So, this morning on the second round of burppies I was not wanting to do them. Reason I do classes. Your more likely to do the stuff you don't want to. But, the memory of my first modified burpy came to mind. I had to get on my knees lay out on my stomach and get up any way I could. It took forever and I was so out of breath. Then it became get to your knees and stand up. I know there still not perfect. But, I don't stop at my knees. I had to move on from every modification. It took progressions and time. I had to modify then I had to try without the modification. There's still a lot I can't do yet but, I know with time and if I keep trying it will happen. My prisoner will get up one day. And, I can't wait to tell everyone about it.

I lived

This song started my thinking today. As a reminder of why I started and keep going. This song talks about living. I struggle with the question what do you want. I felt like God was telling me what do you want? What is it. I want to live. I don't want to be a slave to the that shows me people acting like they're living. Well guess what I am not in shape. My body won't let me live like I want to. So, I need to train. I have to work at it. I can't stop. I want to live. So when you picture Noah screaming at me. That's my answer. I want to live.

Journeys

I can't shake thinking about journeys. Not just mine. Not how mine wasn't my plan. But, no one wants the the crappy sucky days, months, or years. We all want tje rainbow. We all want the joy. But, those sucky days mold us to who we are. You have to keep going. Have to get stronger. Don't stop. And, on the journey sometimes you find the awesome. I know everyone's journey is them and created just for them. My journey isn't over. Still working at it. But, seeing the awesome in even the bad days makes everyday something to look forward to.

One day.

One day is a phase used around my house a lot. It's like a dream. One day bills will be easier to make. They are. One day we will go on vacation. One day we will travel. One day we will be healthier. One day. All of our one days take planning and hard work. One day Shane wanted to be a lawyer. One day we will go on a honeymoon. One day is taking work. I want to be more fit. I want one day to come. One day Shane won't have to rely on pills to keep his sugar regulated. One day I will run a 5K. One day my knees won't hurt everytime I workout. I plan to live healthier so one day will be awesome. It's all about one day and prayers for those one days.

Keep trying

Today it was brought to my attention how I did plank/jacks yesterday. And, how I couldn't at the beginning. And, some people when faced with that would quit. Oh I wanted to. But, my conversation with God was I am going to do what I can do and just keep moving. So, that's what I'm doing. There are still things my body won't let me do yet. I keep trying. One day I will. I can't wish it so.  I have to keep working at it. And keep praying. That's it today.

Shopping

Today was nice. Only had one kid clothes shopping. I was in need of more workout clothes. Good news JC Pennys carries extended sizes. And, on sale they where. $2 I am a shopper. I did enjoy shopping a size smaller and everything fit. Even two sizes smaller fit. Only came home with what I needed right now. The only child I took was my tiny girl. We have all kinds of issues getting clothes to fit her. I was so happy to get a swimsuit that fit her tiny longer frame. Me on the other hand. I am not looking forward to swimsuit shopping but, need to keep my confidence up for an example to my girls. Have to love this body God gave me. Hope everyone enjoys their day.

Hysterectomy

Today I'm feeling great. Made all 5 days this week and put in some miles. I know my title. What's up with that? Well, today I am really thankful I had it done. I remember how bad it was before. It would keep me from wanting to move let alone go to the gym and get sore. It's a big relief to not have to worry about pregnancy as well. I think Benny helped me with this decision. I did not want to go through that again. Even though I did enjoy my pregnancy with him. The heart break that came is something I didn't want to go through again. I'm really looking forward to this summer with the kids and more energy. Who would have thought I could change some eating habits get rid of an organ, workout and be so happy. Well, happy today. Gotta keep moving.

It's just Thursday

Well, it is. For me that's laundry day. It's also menu and shopping day. I think I might take this task a little more seriously now than I did before. You see it's what keeps my diet going. I choose the fuel for my family most of them like it. One resist a lot. So, there's a lot of prayer that happens today. That good choices are made. Don't go buy the candy that's really cheap. It does save money and calories when we ate at home. Did do a "family style buffett" dinner last night. That would be way splurge. Hushpuppies when your hungry because you skipped breakfast just a bad idea. Time to get back up and keep going. Slipping up isn't the end of the world. Call it out and move on. So, here we go. Still at the gym. Still with the water. Still trying to limit sugar and carbs.

Just a crapy day

Been on an emotional roller coaster. By the way that sucks. Knees hurt so elipitial was way slower then I wanted. Did my workout. Made more prep breakfast. Been crying most of the morning. Just sucky feeling. Going to keep my ass away from the food today though. There's no real comfort there. So say a little pray if you think of it. Feeling this emotional battle today.

Calling it out.

I have to ask God constantly to help me call out the negative. I had to quit weighing. The scale would be a yo-yo. And, it made what I was doing feel pointless. So, the decision was made to wait. This year my birthday because it's license year (part of getting old) and I don't want to lie this year. When I'm sore and just want to stay in bed. I know I'm not the only sore one getting up. I thank God we all talk about being sore and keep moving together. Sometimes I look in the mirror and realize this body won't be that dream body. But, in a way it is. It keeps moving. It is getting stronger. I got tired of people telling me I can't do it. You won't keep going to the gym. You can't do it with out medicine, surgery or any other crazy thing. That's all wrong. I can do it with God! Even if I have to ask for strength everyday. It's worth it. I'm worth it.

Type A or B

Why does Shane think I'm type A? I think he is but he sleeps easy and can turn his brain off. There are days I wished I could stay focused and keep rolling. All but the boldness I guess I am type A. I love to compete with myself more than someone else. Witch is a great thing today. I did my first V-up! I want to shout but more had to be done. They certainly are challenging and I love it. I love when God gives me the strength to do new things. It is so awesome. It is the game I play by myself. I love a new challenge. Trying to find delicious healthy meals is a fun challenge. Expecially when you're trying to get 5 people to like it. I'm ready to live. God and me have all kinds of stuff in store. My present shape is going to have to change. More water please. Time to get my day going.

Love myself

Love myself sounds weird. But, I have to work on it everyday. This body, this gift God gave me. Loving it somedays is hard. Today was hard to go sore and move. Nope I don't feel better afterwards. I think I may have drank to much coffee so I feel sick this morning. Kept moving and good news I didn't get sick. My prayer is I get up tomorrow and do it again. The sit-ups where a little easier, we'll the first 15 were. My prisoner is still stuck on the ground one day I will get there. Still need to read my Bible today. Prayers for good choices.

Haters

Weird title. But, I fight with the biggest hater everyday. It's me. It's a battle when I doubt myself. When I just want to sleep in. I'm sore. I see no point in this. I fell off the eating better (little chocolate bars last night 7). So, today everything is sore. I got out of bed woke up my beautiful children and put on my workout clothes. Lift myself back up sore and ready to go. I have no end goal this is it. I want it to get easier. I want to jog further. I have monetary goals. Like my new year how soon can I finish my 500 miles. It's a little at a time but I'm building again. My single servering has been going well. Finished 90oz of water yesterday. I drink 20 before I have anything. (Coffee or tea in the morning) it sets my day off. The other haters are people that don't know you. They don't know the struggles you think are written all over you. I fight with gluttony. I over enjoy food. Or I'm sad or have been pushed down and fall everytime I try. Today I see a fighter that gets back up and at it again. I fall, I hurt, and I mess up but I'm not quitting. Now for the mom day cooking and laundry. And, for my mind I started a new bible study.

Food changes

There are days I know I have to look at food differently. I put to much comfort in food. We male memories around it. Oh sugar sets off different things in our brain. I am trying to look it at like fuel. My engine needs good fuel to run. I heard this concept before and I stole it. I know days I eat to much or make poor decisions I don't feel like working out. I don't feel like doing much. When taking care of me and my family because for the most part I choose their food as well. I try to balance it. Sometimes the bad fuel comes in at little burst helps is from over doing it. Same subject I can't believe I only had one little chocolate bar last night, fun sized. I normally have ten. I do challenge myself in this portion control and what makes me run better.
Water was good yesterday over 100oz. Kept to single servering by putting the leftovers away after I plated everyone's dinner. If it's not out in the open we don't think to ask for more.

Challenging

Challenging, I have felt is my word for this year. Doesn't it sound better then hard. Or it takes work. I choose to challenge myself to try new things to push a little further. That sounds awesome. In all my excitement I really know God is with me. Sunday he adds it to the message clearly was spoken to me. Because, my response during service that's my word for the year! God bless me. I needed that reminder. That I choose to challenge myself daily. I want to read a devotional daily 5 days a week. Be a better mom daily. Challenge myself to in the moment world. So, diet wasn't so great yesterday. Stayed on top of my water. Had a little to much Chinese food. Way to much sodium. I should have planned my day better. I will celebrate no pizza small piece of cake and one serving at dinner. And, no late night snack. And, knowing I don't pray alone in this world. Til tomorrow love yall!

Snow day

Stuck in my little corner of the world. Days like today are rough. Harder to stick to my plan. So far so good. No binging. I did spend my morning cooking. But, not eating. Still one serving room keeping up with my water. Really looking forward to working out with my husband tomorrow. I feel like a marshmallow today. Not much else to write about.

Inspiration

I got all my water and then some yesterday. Hard to believe I had two caffeines with 120oz of water. Sometimes I need inspiration. I don't think I can ever keep this up. I know I have fallen a lot when it comes to this healthier life style. A lot of people around me have tasted the healthier bodies. I think of their smiles when they lost it with hard work and dedication. My husband, brother, and bestie have all been there. They have gained some back and most of them are getting back on that train I think because they know how it feels to be healthier. It keeps me from binges most days. I remind myself God is with me through this. Sore muscles means they are getting stronger. The desire in my heart is to enjoy this life not to watch it go by. Not to wish for the might have been. I love being outside with my family. Fixed one excuse of why I can't do it. Working on the other now.
I didn't binge yesterday. Had a little more cornbread then I should have but still rolling today.

A new day

I woke up sore. Like I didn't want to move. Said a quick prayer had to get this day and the kids going. You know did the mom stuff breakfast and lunch for the littles. Rushed my oldest to get her lunch packed. Put on my gym clothes. Went to grab the last apple and eat half of it but it was gone. My plan is not going well on not being hungry this morning. Got in the van asked what Lauren had packed for her lunch. Apple and peanut butter. I'm not going to grip those are great choices for her. I had my first bottle of water down and I have my mints in my van. I'm good. Moved my sore muscles on the elipitial first get all losed up. She wrote new stuff on the board today. What is this new stuff? We did minute rounds 3 2 1. At your own pace. New stuff. Wall ball sit ups. That was challenging. Inner thigh Jack's. I'm barely coordinated enough for a regular jumping jack so you can imagine I messed that one up pretty good. I know I always wanted to be a dancer but my movements never quite looked I how I picked me doing them in my head. So neither did do jumping jack and bring your leg up and touch it. But, I have to keep moving. Even looking silly and not quite doing it right.

My eating yesterday God helped me with that battle. Oh I really want the candy in the freezer that my husband put in there and forgot. Who forgets candy? Battled that beige with my mints and water.  It will be OK to have them again when I will stop at one or two not 20. So, none for me right now. Having an awesome day.

Routine

I love my routine in the mornings. I get everyone up and going fix hair, breakfast, and lunches. Then out the door running. My kids are at school first thing. You know so they can be social or get extra help with work. Or so mom doesn't have to sit in traffic. I got to the gym early was going to class today. But, waiting just seemed to take forever. So, slow mile it is. Then class in the mirror room. I don't like the mirrors but, I'm getting over it. I was sweating like crazy the heater was on. Melting was the was to go. No weights today but my body weight is enough. Was super excited when I did a few jaxs on the step. Incase you didn't know jumping this much weight offor the ground is some work. I was excited to push myself a little more today even while I groaned through it. Drank over 100oz of water yesterday. Already have 40 down this morning. More workout diet stores to come tomorrow!

It's new years day!

Keeping good with my water and single servering. Weighed today. For the year I have lost 29lbs. I have cheated and looked at my weight a few times at the doctors office so I have watched it go up and down this month a lot. Glad to be on the down end now. Next weigh is on my birthday. Can't wait to workout today.  My workout yesterday made me feel awesome. Even kept to two slices of pizza when we went out. Now I'm sure those sugary drinks added up. But, I don't drink that much. I am really looking forward to this year. Praying on my new goals I will write them down soon.